choosing the odd one

 I like my job... The fringe benefits are priceless: clean air to breathe...; stillness, solitude and space; an unobstructed view every day and every night of sun, sky, stars, clouds, mountains, moon, cliff rock and innocent students; a sense of time enough to let thought and feeling range from here to the end of the world and back; the discovery of something intimate - though impossible to name - in the remote.  I like my job because uncivilized people live here and I see area to make revolution. I see more human effort here than luxury. I see horse helping human and Cows making human living. I see people valuing small amount of money. I see people bare foot stepping over sharp stones and sticks. I smell human sweat over the torn clothes. I see evolution here which my parents did at past because everything is thirty years back here.
I had chosen to live in such an uncultivated habitat cutting the network between friends and families. Did I make a mistake? Many people thought so, and told me in uncertain terms that I was being away from comforts that I deserved. I agreed, it was of some meanings but I had a purpose for being here. The purpose was to grow some age in the mountain, not to shrink but to become part of a wood and to see nature little closer.
This is my sojourn; I live quite far from my loved people. But as far as this heart is open and free; I am spontaneous.
Sometimes, I become aware of the immense silence in which I get lost. Not a silence so much as a great stillness - for there are a few sounds: the creak of some bird in a tree, an whirlpool of wind which passes and fades like a sigh, the ticking of the watch on my wrist - slight noises which break the sensation of absolute silence but at the same time exaggerate my sense of the surrounding, overwhelming peace, a suspension of time, a continuous present. If I look at the small device strapped to my wrist, the numbers, even the sweeping second hand, seem meaningless, almost ridiculous. Wilderness aches sometimes, it’s lonesome but it becomes urgency to reconnect with natural world. This is how natural elements become my friends. They hear my voice and I hear them, there is rhythm between us. And this is probably how I got adapted to live here.
The more I learnt about the basic human efforts, the more convinced I became with my dream and life. It was through accepting myself as an ordinary boy I got to live like bizarre.